Today's Seniors: The Prospects and Problems

Our government and the Canadian households are challenged by the burgeoning seniors’ population and their problems associated with them. For example, a Canadian survey in 2014 showed, over 6 million Canadians were aged 65 or older, representing 15.6 percent of Canada'spopulation. The survey predicts that 23 percent of the Canadianswill be seniors by the year 2030. Another study shows that loneliness/boredom is the number one concern with the elderlies. What can we do to tackle these problems and harness the prospect associated with our seniors?


Government of Canada has made every effort, ensuring that the seniors have access to information, services and benefits they need. But the seniors have many other needs, apart from the financial and healthcare benefits. Although, many seniors can't survive without the government's financial and healthcare benefits, they've other needs also. For example, studies shows that most of the seniors are bored and lonely. In today's nuclear family system, most senior can't expect to be looked after in their own home by their own family members. Invariably they end up taking refuse in some Centre when they reach to their end-of-life-cycle.


But most seniors are better off financially than the younger generation according to Maryalene LaPonsie who writes for the US News. Marylalene sites "In 2000, 45- to 54-year-olds topped the index, with 75 percent being financially secure. By 2014, that group dropped to 68 percent, while the score for 65- to 74-year-olds increased to 69 percent. The group with the lowest financial security is 25- to 34-year-olds, with only about half (56 percent) being financially secure in 2014".


So, today's seniors don't just impose problem on the younger generation, they bring job prospects for the young people also.


Furthermore, taking care of seniors shouldn't just be government's responsibility. The family members and the public at large need to remember their own responsibilities with regards to their seniors. Since both of these groups benefits from the seniors' saving and tax payments, government alone shouldn't be the one to blame for our elders' problems including their boredom and looniness.

Tracking down my ancestry

My father was aloof and didn’t share much about his past with us, his children. He didn’t talk about his family either. The few stories he shared with us were not pleasant and, since, his only sibling died when I was very young, I really didn’t know about his side of family until a few month ago.

I thought I didn't care about my parents’ root until a few months ago. Then, I got a chance to visit my father’s birthplace and discovered very intriguing family history:


My father’s great great-grandfather moved to Dhading from Gorkha destrict five generations ago. His name was Laxmi Nath Adhikari, but he is mostly known as the “jame budha” in Dhading. Jama means long skirt and budha means an old man in Nepali. So, if my father’s great great-grandfather wore long skirt, was tall and fair and his last name was “Adhikari”, there is a fair chance that he came from a Rajput family in central and northern ancient India.


I don’t know exactly what year my ancestor had left India, but it should have been during the Growth of Muslim Population in Medieval India around 1500 AD. Since the Islamic rulers treated all the non-Muslims (Hindus, Buddhists and Jains) awfully and forced them to pay taxes or face the prosecution (if they wanted to keep their religious freedom in India), my Rajput ancestors must have fled to Nepal to avoid all that and to raise their family peacefully.


The fact that my father's last name is Adhikari could be another clue that my ancestors were the Rajputs.  Adhikari in Sanskrit means the one with power (adhikar) over someone of something. Since the Rajputs ruled some central and northern parts of ancient India, their descendants are called the “sons of the king” or Adhikari!


Another reason for me to think about my ancestors that was is that two of my great aunts lived in Tripureshwor, Kathmandu. Tripureshwor was already a fully developed town by the time I came to know these aunts. Since they lived inside the crowded allies, my great aunts were fair-skinned and delicate.

But my parents had moved to a suburb and won several plots of land. That meant we grew our own food, sun-dry some of them for later use when I was growing up.  So, when our  aunts visited us in the village they helped us sun-drying the grains and collect them from the straw-mats wearing their face masks.

Two other clues were that one of my father’s relatives lived in a palace-look house near Gorkha (the Shah Kings’ palace at the time). My mother said the family of this relative spoke the “palace-language” and lived luxuriously!

And, of course, my own father was raised by the “hajuria”. Hajuria is the title given to a king’s close-encounters or advisor. In my father’s case, his god-father played cards with the “second-king” of Nepal, Juddha Samsher Jungha Bahadur Rana.

The second clue is that my father’s family belong to Rishi Kashyap. Kashyap rishi was one of the seven original rishis who supposedly wrote many of the stories (hymns) for the Upanishads.

For example, it is believed that all Hindus are the off springs of the original seven rishis or “Saptarishis”. It is also the belief that our “gotra” tells us which rishi was our forefather, since gotra is the term used to indicate our family linage.

So, my father’s side of family came from the Rishi Kashyap and they carry Kashyap gotra. Knowing I could be the descended of Kashyaparishi and my ancestors may have ruled some parts of ancient India was pretty cool!

Past life connection

I’m very close to two younger ladies. One of them could be less than half of my age and another one could be a few decades younger. They’re hardworking, conscious and kind. I met them at a friend’s place a few years ago. I didn’t make special efforts to be their friend, they just like my company and I like theirs. Was I related to them in my previous life, I wonder?

One of them calls or texts me to say "good morning" or "good night" every single day. She shares her stories with me freely and offers her love and understanding to me also. With all the other people in her life, why me? I wonder why she put so much trust on me?

I’m a believer of past life connections and the notion of reincarnation.  I believe that people return to the earth to finish their unfinished business in their past life, or the  universe brings them back to keep the world go round and around. Either way, it proves that our soul never dies. It keeps returning to the earth and the cycle of birth and death continues.

When we think the birth and death cycle this way, we can understand why we meet with some people, like or dislike them, accept or reject them, etc. 

The notion of "karma" also makes sense when we think about the cycle of birth, death and the incidences in between these periods. Karma justify our fortune and misfortune. Karma explains why we think of the way we do. Karma also tells us why we meet someone and stick with that person even when we dislike that person so much. So much so, that some people refuse to give up their relationships with their husband or other family members, boyfriends, or whoever even after suspecting that they maybe murdered one day from their very hands! 

I think there are reasons for everything happening in my life or anyone else's in this matter. We're here in this world either to payback or to get paid. In another word, we're back to balance our accounts of our past life and create new ones for the next life. 

Life is a balance-sheet

My husband keeps his accounts balanced every single times.  For example, if he eats little too much the day before, he skips his breakfast the next day. If he goes to bed a little earlier than his usual bedtime, he wakes up earlier than usual time and goes to work. If he can't sleep at night, he gets up and start working on his paper, or whatever work is pending. If he is upset with an outsider, he takes his frustration out with an insider. If he is happy, he shows that too.  You know what I mean? His balance sheets are always balanced!

I was always amazed at my husband's ingenuity. He reads and watches a lot of motivational articles/shows to pump him up. So, I thought of watching a motivational show on how to get up early in the morning. 

My problem of getting up early morning wasn’t about waking up, it was about not going to  bed on time, the speaker on the show said.  "Sleeping has to be at the same time consistently every night," she emphasised. People can’t wakeup because they don’t go to bed early enough to give them enough sleep. "It's not the waking problem people have, it's the problem with their bedtime," she said confidently.

You see, our body needs only so many hours' sleep every day. Sleep hours differ from person to person, depending on the individual's needs, but people do wakeup after certain hours. Humans are built that way! 

This discovery helped me find an answer of my another question. I'm a bad sleeper. I feel that I've never gotten a good night's rest. I feel that my mind and ears are always active. So, when I wake up at night, I get anxious but stay in bed.

That was my problem number two! Sleep comes only when body is relaxed--I've known this for years. So, lying down in bed and hopping to fall asleep again meant not only I was losing sleep, but also losing time that I could have used to achieve something else. 

Moral of the story is life is a balance sheet. If our balance sheet doesn't balance, there is a good reason for it!  

"Life is a series of delicate balances. When one balance is lost, another must be found"
Source: Unknown

Our carryover life

My inner mind knows I can’t make everything I wand or desire happen for me or for anyone else.  Moreover, I see some truth in the saying:  “luck and wisdom go hand-on-hand”.  How else can we describe thousands of unexplainable incidences happening everywhere in this world? 

As much as I like to believe that luck is made with hard work and good attitude, there are the evidences that mental capacity of every normal baby is the same, but some of them know exactly who they want to become when they grow up, but others never can figure out. Why some of them seek others advice, while others hate to be told what to do? We’ve seen these phenomena among the children born and raised by the same parents in the  exact same environment.

There are so many why’s I can think of, but can’t explain. So, I know it’s not me to make my fate or anyone else. Still I worry sometime and lose several nights’ sleep.  This is life. In life we need to work, worry sometime and engage in good/bad karma to carryover to our next life.

Power of thoughts

Please don’t  remind me of my past 

Instead, tell me what I can do to change my tomorrow

Let me be pure soul, peaceful and full of love
Love me and show me that you care

Tell me that everything will be alright, again

Instead of telling me that everything is bad because of me!

Remind me that people are capable of changing

Remind me that people are capable of loving

Send me the positive vibration now and then, reminding me that

Good things are coming!

Don’t be hurt and prevent others from hurting me 

Send me the good vibration and I’ll send you mine

By accepting the way we’re,

Let’s change our destiny 

By changing some of our bad sanskars with the good ones

By doing all this, you’re creating your destiny, and 

I’m creating mine!

Feeling myself again

After going through a full circle of sadness, I’ve come back to myself now 

It’s hard to express how I felt all these years

Living with no hope and sadness everywhere

Then, I realized I can’t change my  past 

But I can my future if I try!

I’m reading a lot of literatures these days

Some are academic and lot are spiritual

They’ve given me some hope to change my future

Solving my problems are within my power

One-by-one I can make things right,
if I hold my thoughts and look at the bright side.

I started changing my thoughts, like the bulb I replaced today

The hallway was dark when we moved into its way

And remained the darkness for the last 25 days

Today I decided to replace the burnout bulb with the new one

It’s done now, no more darkness in our hallway!

Today I fixed the patio screen door in our balcony

It was off the track for the last few days

It came off the track when my husband tried opening it wider

He tried putting back the screen door, but couldn’t find a way

Today I decided to fix it, but I couldn’t the first three times

I pushed the door a little inside and put it back on its position

I did it with my persistence efforts and determination!