Monday 30 September 2013

Taking things for granted

It was a perfect evening for a walk in Fredericton, NB. As I stroll up the hill with my husband, a cool comfortable breeze blew at our faces, then I suddenly noticed the breath I took – a deep, long, strong inhalation that I felt it was the first time I had done so. Instantly, I thought about my brother who is fighting for his life in a hospital in Nepal. “If he could draw the kind of air I just did into his lungs a couple of times without the help of ventilation, he would be up and running” I imagined.
For the first time in my entire life I became so thankful for each breath going in and out of my lungs!

Monday 2 September 2013

Me and the Pickle jar: Radha's story

I found a jar of artichoke pickle molded and rot in my refrigerator:

"A strange thought struck in me," said Radha. Then I started chatting with my pickle jar, sitting on my countertop and looking as impatient as I'm: 
Me: waiting for my children to pick the career they want, so that I’ll know what kind of future they’ll have.
Pickle jar: waiting for one my children to come home and eat me up.
Me: waiting for my children to marry with their boyfriend/girlfriend, so that I can finish some of my motherly responsibilities.
Pickle jar: waiting for my children to come home and find me still waiting.
Me: waiting for my children to settle down, so that they could take their belonging to their own place.
Pickle jar: rotten but still waiting…
Me: waiting for my children to sort out what they want to keep, so that I could give away the things they don’t want.
Pickle jar: can’t wait any longer; I’m out of here and in the garbage now!
Me: still waiting for my children to come home and give me some good news…
 
Radha tosses the pickle jar into the garbage and goes for a long walk.

The end.


Tuesday 30 July 2013

Being honest and being known to be


“While honesty and integrity are financially detrimental in today's society, the needs of the future will almost certainly reverse that. Honest people will be so, no matter what the prevailing political climate is, and have been disadvantaged for many years for being so. In the near future that will change, being honest and being known to be, will become the benefit it always should have been.”

 By
 Perry McCarney.

Sunday 7 July 2013

My mom was not a drug addict and sex trader


Please read this to understand why some women do what they do:

For two years now, The Missing Women Inquiry in B.C. has been investigating how so many women - no one knows the exact number - could be murdered right under the nose of the Vancouver Police Department.

One of those women was Brenda Wolfe, a mother of two young girls.
Not much is known about Brenda Wolfe. She came to Vancouver's Downtown East Side from southern Alberta. She liked country music. She liked to dance. She could be kind. She could be very tough. And she'd do whatever it took to support her two daughters, Angel and Destiny.
It was at the intersection of Main and Hastings, in front of the Balmoral Hotel, that Brenda Wolfe was last seen alive. She was 30 years old. Three years later, her remains were found on Robert Pickton's pig farm.
Wally Oppal, the commissioner of the Missing Women's Inquiry, heard from 83 witnesses. Brenda Wolfe's daughter Angel, now 19, was one of them. Mr. Oppal is expected to release his report within the next few weeks.
This week, though, we bring you Angel's story. For the first five years of Angel's life, the downtown east side was home. Angel Wolfe is one of many who have spent a lifetime coming to terms with what happened there. Here in her own words, is the story of Brenda's Angel.
Some of what you will hear may be disturbing to some listeners.
Angel Wolfe is an active social justice volunteer and public speaker. She works with the organization, Sex Trade 101, to help women and their children to escape the sex trade. She is also an active volunteer with Canadian Roots Exchange, an organization dedicated to bridging the gap between young Aboriginal and non-Aboriginal Canadians. One day, Angel hopes to go back to school and become a police officer.
Brenda's Angel was produced by Marjorie Nichol
Source:  The Sunday Edition with Michael Enright, CBC Radio One
Available at:         http://www.cbc.ca/thesundayedition/documentaries/2013/07/07/a-daughter-a-mother-and-vancouvers-missing-women/

Note: If you  rather hear this compelling story from Brenda’s own "Angle", please click at:

Monday 1 July 2013

Behind every successful man is a woman

After so many years I accidently got to watch The Flintstones and loved it! This is the 1960’s shows, of course, but you still can watch the re-runs, I didn’t know.

Flintstones used to be one of my favorite shows when children were growing up and, I especially loved the episode when Fred takes credit for his best pal Burney's heroic act (saving a girl from a runaway carriage). But with his wife, Wilma's, help he gets his conscience back and confess that Barney is the real hero, not him.

Like Wilma and Marge (The Simpsons), I wonder how many brainy wives are behind their "successful" men, helping their husbands do the right thing for their own family and for the greater good?

The Flintstones and The Simpsons are family shows you should make some time to watch with your family. 

For fun shake, I searched for other family shows and found these:

Behind every successful man you'll find a woman who has nothing to wear.
http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/quotes/h/haroldcoff391973.html#OAD5GMJihwAOspTB.99


 A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man. 

Lana Turner
http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/keywords/successful_man.html#vGwyAIRgA2D75qua.99

The man who has the courage of his platitudes is always a successful man.

Van Wyck Brooks
http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/keywords/successful_man.html#rmqhMFQ0J8XyykhC.99

Bob Brown
Behind every successful man there's a lot of unsuccessful years.
http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/keywords/successful_man.html#5sePcXjVDyWSSB2U.99


Clement Stone
Every great man, every successful man, no matter what the field of endeavor, has known the magic that lies in these words: every adversity has the seed of an equivalent or greater benefit.

More from Clement Stone
http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/keywords/successful_man.html#rmqhMFQ0J8XyykhC.99

The successful man doesn't use others, other people use the successful man, for above all the success is of service.

 Mark Caine
http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/keywords/successful_man.html#rmqhMFQ0J8XyykhC.99

The successful man is the one who had the chance and took it.

Roger Babson
http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/keywords/successful_man.html#rmqhMFQ0J8XyykhC.99


Source: http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/keywords/successful_man.html

Sunday 16 June 2013

Born empty handed and will die empty handed

I heard one of my childhood friends was hit by a vehicle last night. She is lying flat lifelessly in the hospital bed in her town, while the doctors are trying to figure out the severity of her injured brain, another friend of mine reported me.
I grew up side-by-side with both of these friends in the same town. The first friend was a vivacious person with an inquisitive mind and strong body when we’re growing up. She performed better than I did in school and in sports. She had to be on ‘top’ always and aggressively yearned for wealth. She didn’t need much sleep or any other form of physical rest as her mind overworked tirelessly.


With her hard work and determinations, she had amassed everything she wanted! She had a long career with the government, few rental properties nearby to cover her living costs, and her investments in the financial markets were growing exponentially. Most of these investments she will never have to touch since her residual income (passive income) were enough for her and her family to live even if they survived for hundred more years!

This friend of mine had been buying property left and right. She never let go of any ‘good’ piece of land or home that had a potential to increase overnight-value. Once, she even bought the piece of land behind her mother for which her mother had already made advance payments for to secure the deal.Her love for money had over shadowed her conscience. She had forgotten that we were born empty handed and will die empty handed
When she had a liquidity problems (she ran out of cash in her bank), this friend of mine borrowed money from her friends and relatives and financed the properties she eyed to --not because she needed but simply out of greed!  She often borrowed from the relatives or friends who had the least for themselves, because my friend calculated that by exploiting the people with no ‘voice’ in the public her aggression would be kept secret from the public.

Now, my friend is lying on the hospital bed disoriented, I heard. Most of her body-parts are wrapped in bandage, they tell me. However, she can talk a little, although not coherently. She can drink a little, although has not been able to keep in her stomach for long. She started to go to washroom with the help of her family and friends since yesterday, they assured me. Thanks to her iron-will, which seems to be still functioning well!

Midst of my friend’s ordeal, I heard that her husband is running around looking for a person to borrowing money from. He needed the money for his wife’s treatments, he's been telling people.  While his lifeless wife barely knows what is happening around her, he on the other hand, seems to be ‘too aware’ of the depleting savings in their bank accounts.

Putting everything together, it seems that my friend will live a few more years with minor disability, since all of her vital-parts seem to have started working reasonably well. Is this a good news for the people exploited by my friend for all these years? I don't know.


Regardless of her attitude, she is a wife, mother and a few other things to her family members.  I wonder how her quality of life would be from now on. Will she be the needy person she was in all her life? Or, she will be the convert one with totally healthy life style, I ponder.

I grew up hearing, “as you sow, so shall you reap”, but I was sceptical about it, as I had seen many people getting away with their wrong deeds. But with the news about this friend,  I'm fairly comfortable to assume that you get back what you give to others.  

Sunday 2 June 2013

Not to take seriously: An advice to parents

Learning not to take your own children seriously. It's hard, but we must do it in order to save ourselves from a lot of headaches. Seriously!


Most parents consider their children part of them and they are, theoretically. This was the thinking of most children also until a few decades ago, which made the world go-around smoothly for so many centuries. But the time has changed.

Now, most of the children don’t think the same way their parents do. These children are not capable of thinking about their parents. This does not mean they would not expect help of all sort from their parents; they do. In fact, they automatically think what belongs to their parents is theirs also and they think it is their rights to seek help from parents when they are in difficulty, but not vice versa!

They would come home and tell you “so and so’s parents did this and that for their children” But they would never take the time to find out what their “so and so” have done to deserve those things from their parents.

When you deal with our grownup children, you cannot treat them like kids. They would be mad if you do. However, if you treat them like a grownup, they wouldn't like that either. They can become your kids conveniently or act like grownup when  suits them.

Children have their ‘rights’ to become who they want in situations that suit them!


There is no winning with your own children. If they’re successful, they take the credit – “I work my butt off,” they would say. If they can’t make it –realizing that they were wrong, they’ll always blame parents --“You screwed me up.” There is no winning!


When it comes to dealing with your own children, you can’t count on them to be accountable for their mistakes. They will tell “We’re only human being. Making mistakes is how we learn”. But if you try telling them your experiences and suggest them, giving examples of someone who are diligent and hardworking, they will shut you off, by telling that they wouldn’t like to be compared with anyone. “I’m not them,” is their readymade answer that fits in most of their situation!


Advice from your children's guidance counselor, psychologist or psychiatrics are useless. Most of these individuals are running with the same problems at their own home. You can’t even trust the people in your own “support-group”. Even within the circle, I’ve noticed some parents lying through their teeth to keep their children’s misbehaviours to themselves.