2018’s Thanksgiving Day

This is 2018’s Thanksgiving Day. I’m thinking all the way back when we started celebrating Thanksgiving days with our children in Canada. I’m remembering how I used to decorate our front porch with fall flowers and dry branches, the lineup pumpkins, the colourful writhe, the big flowerpots with hanging geraniums and tall grass in front of our house. I enjoy the flashback of our children enjoying and decorating our formal dining table. These are the things of the past, but I’ve cherished them all in my memories!


Yesterday we invited a few families with their little girls. I cooked variety of food for grownups and ordered pizza and cake for the girls. My husband was anxious about how the new people will behave and how we’ll manage to enjoy the party. But it turned out a fun-filled evening for all of us! We went to bed being thankful to God.


This morning I took a leisurely walk, enjoying the marvellous colours of the fall and the wilderness in our neighbourhood. Feeling grateful and thanking God that there is nothing like nature. No invention, no technology, no human or any living being can replicate what nature is able to create!

There are many things I wished I knew when I was growing up. For example, if I knew how important public relations and networking are for our mental, financial and public life, I wouldn’t have burned my bridge.


With all my ignorance, I’m still proud of my decision to marry the man I did, have the children I’ve and for my courage to go back to school. Yes, there are nights I can’t sleep thinking about my children’s futures. Yes, I curse my family middle of some nights/evenings and in between my prayers. But it’s life. Comparing to the alternatives I would have if I wasn’t married or not have children, this is a much better life I’m living. 

Reclaiming my life

My husband had been telling me “Take time to walk”. “If you don’t have health, there is nothing you can enjoy”. Walking is good, I knew, but I was busy with things—sometimes I had to finish a book or blogpost/book chapter, other times I had to finish cleaning my house. Sometimes I had to be somewhere for someone, and other times I had to be somewhere for myself. For one thing or other, I’d not been able resume my walk everyday.


Then, I lost the ‘small’ of my back while trying to pickup a piece of pepper from the flour. A sharp pain suddenly surged throughout my back and I knew I had slipped one or more of my discs, causing pressure on my spinal cord and nervous system.


With God’s grace I eventually recovered my back, but I didn’t forget the pain! The pain stayed with me whole day, reminding me how fragile our life really is, and I determined to walk every morning as long as I live once I recovered from the injury.


Yesterday I walked on the pathway that connects a small neighbourhood to the middle school, where two of our children attended, in my community. While passing through the pathway I noticed a fairly large patch of wild peas. I’d noticed this patch many times during our walks in the fall, and tried taking picture many times, but my husband discouraged me, laughing and telling me how a small thing can distract me from a Big thing at hand! This morning I was alone, and I had my cellphone with me.

             

Patches of Kootooli Kosha plant with their drying our pods

The patch of springing plants above are called “Kootooli Kosha” in Nepal. Kootooli Kosha are the tiny peas in pods. They taste similar to the "small" peas grown and sell in Nepal, but these peas are a bit stronger and they're lightly bitter. They come in deep-green and slightly yellois--mung bean colour . They are wild peas, grows along the pathway in the wilderness in Nepal. Since this variety is not available in North America most people may not know about this type of peas.


As children, my friends and I used to pull a few springs of kootooli kosha on our way to school or back to home. There was never enough kootooli kosha to fill our stomach, but it was fun to chew on while walking with friends leisurely.



Although this patch above is drying out along with the pods of the kootooli kosha, this patch brought back some of my fun memories with my friends, and reminded other patches of kootooli koshas in my parents’ fields. It was a reminder of how a small thing like nibbling on the humble grain with my family members and friends can be a life-time memory!

The Mind-thing

This is a story about an elderly lady and her family. Her name is Komal. Komal means soft or gentle in Sanskrit.


Komal grew up in a cultured family. Her parents were educated people and their conscience was clear. They taught her what is “right” and what is “wrong” from the beginning. With her gentle nature and conscientious mind, she could do no wrong to anyone!


She got married with an elite man who is also considerate to others. Together they have four children. Komal stayed home and raised her children as best as she could.


The world has changed since Komal's children rearing days. Unlike her time, now the married women keep their career even after marrying and having children. Both husband and wife equally share all responsibilities, household chores and rearing children. All this means independence and financial freedom for today’s ladies!


Now old and vulnerable, Komal remembers how crazy her days used to be when her husband was building his career and their children were growing up. Buried with responsibilities, her husband always seemed tensed. He expected their house be in order and their children disciplined. He wanted his children to be seen, but not heard, just the way his father wanted when he was growing up.


With age and experience, Komal's husband has changed. Now he believes children should be able to interact with their parents freely. He tells, “Mind is everything”. “You can do anything you like with your mind,” to other children. He gives example of persons who’ve changed the world phenomenally by properly channeling their mind.


Komal knows her husband is doing the right thing. Guiding young people based on past experiences of what works what doesn't is the duty of her and her husband. But her heart aches every time her husband boosts other children’s self-confidence. Her chest tightens every time her husband gives good advise to other children and she becomes emotionally tensed suddenly.

Settling down slowly

My life had been all over the places: at friends’ homes, beaches, parks, weddings and other celebrations. Sometimes a bit hectic, but they were all fun activities. They legitimized my living!


Then we moved back to a new rental place that required some planning and physical works. My husband started teaching and I started inviting friends and relatives, as usual. So, we’re more or less settled in this place.


Yesterday, I called one of our dear old friends, and I took her for lunch. She was happy, and we talked for hours about her family and mine.



I’ve called a few other “new” friends for dinner this weekend. After this, I need to make 3 more parties to complete my self-imposed obligations. Giving rides to a few people who can’t drive/need help will always be there, but that proves I’m alive and still functional!